I've been back to work for two weeks straight now and I'm getting used to the routine. My family, my friends and my colleagues whole heartedly have given me a warm welcome back to work. Everyone's glad that I'm back to work again. And I am really glad to be back to be apart of a great, talented team. I also feel blessed that I have an incredible, really understanding, warming and caring manager.
So far I've contributed just a little of help with validating some reports and learning the new system. But, with everyone knowing that I'm terminally ill with an incurable cancer, everyone is just extra nice to me and super kind and generous. It's nice that that everyone's so nice but in a way in, it just breaks my heart that I'm sick. I shed these silent tears of sadness that I'm not healthy, like everyone is. I mourn and long for my healthy self again, for my normal, happy, healthy life full of future promises with goals, dreams before my diagnosis.
While the routine of work helps distract me from having to think about death, dying, doom and gloom constantly, I still just really sad that I have this terminal cancer diagnosis. I guess I can never really get over this but glad now that I have some work to help diverge me from falling into this dark hole of gloomness and hopelessness.
Cough
This week when I've suddenly started having these miserable dry, persistent, hacking coughing spells for a couple of days, I and everyone around me was concerned about me. I've had it since last week but over the weekend, it grew worse and worse. But luckily by Tuesday, after taking some antibiotics, I'm starting to feel better again. It's still no fun to be taking these big pills but I'm glad it's working to keep this cough away.
Radiogist Consultation Next Week
I still haven't met with the radiologist yet for my Cyberknife and radiation procedure for my nagging bone ache and the 3 mm spot on my brain. They've been off to some sort of big conference and so next week when I meet with them, I'll find out more on what their recommendations are. I'll post an update once I find out.
The kids are doing well. I'm feeling better now that my cough is getting handled with the antibiotics. Lots of Love.
So far I've contributed just a little of help with validating some reports and learning the new system. But, with everyone knowing that I'm terminally ill with an incurable cancer, everyone is just extra nice to me and super kind and generous. It's nice that that everyone's so nice but in a way in, it just breaks my heart that I'm sick. I shed these silent tears of sadness that I'm not healthy, like everyone is. I mourn and long for my healthy self again, for my normal, happy, healthy life full of future promises with goals, dreams before my diagnosis.
While the routine of work helps distract me from having to think about death, dying, doom and gloom constantly, I still just really sad that I have this terminal cancer diagnosis. I guess I can never really get over this but glad now that I have some work to help diverge me from falling into this dark hole of gloomness and hopelessness.
Cough
This week when I've suddenly started having these miserable dry, persistent, hacking coughing spells for a couple of days, I and everyone around me was concerned about me. I've had it since last week but over the weekend, it grew worse and worse. But luckily by Tuesday, after taking some antibiotics, I'm starting to feel better again. It's still no fun to be taking these big pills but I'm glad it's working to keep this cough away.
Radiogist Consultation Next Week
I still haven't met with the radiologist yet for my Cyberknife and radiation procedure for my nagging bone ache and the 3 mm spot on my brain. They've been off to some sort of big conference and so next week when I meet with them, I'll find out more on what their recommendations are. I'll post an update once I find out.
The kids are doing well. I'm feeling better now that my cough is getting handled with the antibiotics. Lots of Love.
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